That’s the only explanation I can come up with for the magical change we have experienced in Micah’s bedtime routine this past week.

It all started last week when he decided one night that I wasn’t going to leave his room. Ever.

Per our usual routine, I changed his diaper, took him upstairs and found his pacifier, put on his t-shirt (summer jammies) and tucked him in. I nursed him and as soon as he was asleep I popped the binkie in his mouth.  Now normally, he would remain asleep and I would slip out undetected. (Though it was a little time consuming, it worked for us. I enjoyed the relaxation and he enjoyed the cuddling. ) But this time, I had barely sat up and he let out a shriek and immediately tried to get up and grab me. I couldn’t get out the door without him following me. So, I quickly plopped him back in bed and told him daddy was going to come back if he got out again. I ran out the door and shut it. I didn’t even get halfway down the stairs and I heard him slam his little body into his door, howling and carrying on. Eric was downstairs listening to the whole thing.

This is exactly what daddies are for, don’t you know?

Eric went upstairs, and in a very matter-of-fact tone, told Mr. Micah to go “night-night” and plopped him back in bed, again. Twice. He left the room, we heard a giant scream, and then… nothing. He went to sleep.

The second night, it played out the same way.

The third night, Eric wasn’t home at bedtime. I was nervous, but I was determined to copy Eric’s technique. As I expected, Micah shrieked and carried on when I got up, but I put him back down, tucked him in and said, “night night Micah.” I walked out like it was no big deal and shut the door. Then I heard nothing. Nothing! He simply went to sleep. By himself!

Then we went camping for the weekend. I forgot the binkie, which added a whole new level of stress to bedtime. We made it through, but not without tears. I think binkie withdrawal over the weekend made Micah really appreciate the binkie when we got home. I could have continued to not give it to him, but I changed my mind. I don’t think he is ready to go without the binkie at bedtime. I will let him have it a little bit longer. Frankly, I have bigger things to worry about than whether he sucks on a piece of silicone at night. For now, the binkie means bedtime. It is his cue, and it has taken on magical properties. I’m reluctant to give it up just yet.

For the past two days, all I have to do is give Micah his binkie and tuck him in, and he will go to sleep on his own. It’s like the twilight zone. Did I come back from the camping trip with a different baby? Micah has always been a very high needs baby. For him to go to sleep this easy is just plain weird. I love it, not going to lie, but it’s still very weird. Tonight, I didn’t even know where Eric had put Micah’s binkie, so I asked Micah and he pointed to it up on the shelf. He happily popped it in his mouth when I gave it to him and jumped in bed by himself. I turned off the lights, pulled his blanket up to his neck and gave him a big kiss on the cheek. “Night night, Micah!” I said happily as I closed his bedroom door. Downstairs I heard him talking to himself a little bit, but after a few minutes he was silent.

I think Micah developed a new awareness of himself and his surroundings that no longer allowed him to be so easily lulled to sleep. Before, going to sleep was something that just sort of happened to Micah. I made it easy for him by tiring him out and then soothing him to sleep. But now, all of a sudden, he needed to actively fall asleep. He needed to do what everyone else takes for granted: block out distractions, close his eyes, lie still and fall asleep. I could hold him still but I couldn’t put that busy toddler mind to rest. If anything, my presence was keeping him up. He would get so close to sleep, and when I would try to leave he would get mad because he wasn’t there yet. I think repeating “night night” over and over as a command finally clued him in that it was something he needed to do himself.  Something clicked. Once he figured it out, he was a happier kid. Now he tells me when he wants to go to sleep and it is much easier for us both. I also think restricting binkie usage to bedtime helped a lot because he associates the binkie with sleeping now. Popping it in his mouth lets him know it’s bedtime and it might even make him sleepy, who knows? Eventually we’ll transition the cue from the binkie to something else like a toy.

I have a lot more free time on my hands now that bedtime takes 2 minutes instead of 20-30. Phew! I wonder what the next big parenting challenge will be…