Ever have one of those days that feels like a parable? My Monday afternoon felt too much like a scripted story to ignore. Monday morning was completely normal. I ate breakfast, got Micah ready, went to the chiropractor and called Eric to meet up for lunch afterward. Then  everything changed as I was driving Eric back to work.

We got rear-ended.

I felt all the blood rush to my head. “Eric, you get out and talk to her because I’m upset.” I stared at the dash with a frown. Why am I a magnet for minor accidents like this? Micah was singing in the back seat, “A car hit us, BOOM!” Eric got back in the car and laughed at me when I flipped on the Christmas music.

“Remember that rust spot on the back hatch?” he asked with a twinkle in his eye. I nodded. “Well we don’t have to worry about that anymore!” We pounded fists and I laughed. You have to see the humor in these types of things. What’s done is done. We waited for about 20 minutes for the sheriff to arrive – he couldn’t find us at first. The whole thing was standard. Before he was finished with the report he popped over to our window to ask us for our registration. Boy, was that a loaded question! Our registration is expired!

“Oh that stinks,” I joked, “we get rear-ended and then we get a ticket?” The cop smiled and asked if we were going to take care of it this week. “Yes!” I said, and he agreed to let it go. I am going on Friday to get that taken care of.

The damage wasn’t horrible; I drove Eric back to work and decided to go to Target to look for a new set of sheets and a comforter. Over lunch we had decided to buy each other a new king size bed for Christmas, something we’ve been wanting forever!

Micah loves shopping. He helped me pick out a new set of charcoal gray flannel sheets, Eric’s favorite kind. I grabbed a Snapple for myself and a carton of Gold Fish crackers for Micah, and we headed up to the checkout.

Everything was normal until the whole register froze up while I swiped my card.

“Oh no, this isn’t happening!!” the cashier exclaimed! After my accident, this wasn’t phasing me. In fact, I wasn’t surprised. I don’t believe in Karma, but Karma was out to get me, probably for not shopping local. Bad, bad Target.

“It’s okay,” I assured her. A supervisor came over to check on things and before I knew it, I was sitting in the cafe with a free bag of popcorn and a slushy, waiting for them to see if my transaction had cleared in the system. Twenty minutes later the cashier and the supervisor came by to let me know that my transaction had not gone through and I had to ring up again at the customer service desk.

“I’m so sorry!” the cashier said empathetically, “I’m going to give you $9 in coupons for your purchase.” I assumed she meant my future purchase, but I was wrong. She rang up the sheets, the Snapple and the Gold Fish crackers and took $9 off the top. I thanked her and walked away, amused. This was turning into quite an interesting day. What else was going to happen?

I spend the rest of the day shopping for a comforter that I liked. Ironically I ended up returning to a different Target and finding the perfect set there. I called Eric and told him to meet me for dinner at Noodles and Company. Buy Local Karma was going to hit me again…

I found what looked like a pubic hair in my cheeseburger macaroni.

My stomach churned as I brought my bowl back up to the counter. I had already eaten a third of the dish, and wondered if I had actually swallowed any other stow-aways. The guy at the counter raised his eyebrows and asked me if I wanted a new one. “Yes, please!” I said, and walked back to my table. Eric and I decided (for our sanity) that it was a curly chest hair instead, because that’s slightly less gross. And really, it could be true. I wanted it to be true.

They brought me a new bowl and then the server came back with a coupon for a free meal at a future visit. Eric commented that we got two free meals from that pub–err– chest hair and I agreed. Of course, he was happy because I only ate about half the new bowl so he got to finish it.

After dinner, we shopped for and bought our brand new king size bed… which we have to wait about a week for. I am so excited to finally have some room to toss and turn! Eric and I have been overheating and bumping into each other every night for over 5 years, and considering the sad state of our very old mattress, it is time to move on!

At the end of the day I realized that while 3 bad things had happened, each bad thing had been redeemed somehow. It made me think about the verse, Romans 8:28, which says:

“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”

I don’t really believe that Buy Local Karma was out to get me, but I do think that in small ways, God was redeeming the bad things that happened to me that day.

Last year I was all, ERIC WE NEEEEED A REAL TREE. He proceeded to remind me of the sap, the needles, the frigid weather, the sap, the needles, watering the tree, and the sap. But I was insistent on “the experience.” So we trekked out to Williams Tree Farm and found the perfect tree. It was so beautiful, so full, and so entirely too big for our living room once we cut the rope off at home. I’m talking completely ridiculous. This tree literally filled half of our living room.  And don’t even get me started on how long it took me and Micah to clean up all those needles. It’s taken me 12 months to admit this. I was wrong about the real tree thing. Totally did not need it – or the experience.

This year I put up our tiny “newlywed-apartment” tree I bought from Walgreens five years ago. I decided it was better than picking up all those needles. It’s a little annoying that it’s fake and looks it…. but at least I can shove it in a box and be done with it after Christmas.

One Christmas is over, I’m seriously considering going out and being a real fake tree. You know, a fake one that isn’t so small I have to put it on top of my coffee table and overfill it with ornaments to hide the huge gaps.

I’ll admit, the title of this post has nothing to do with my life… I don’t think. It’s a line from my new favorite song. The band, Churchill, is near and dear – the bass player is a friend  - Tyler Rima (pronounced “rhyme-ee”). Tyler has always been super talented when it comes to music. He played drums during worship at my old church – and he taught himself. His band is also seriously talented – I just love their sound.

Their new single is “Change” – and I’ve been listening to it over and over this week.

Churchill // Change from Tim Twinem on Vimeo.

Once upon a time, before I was a mom, I had a habit of dying my hair. For a few months, it was even blonde. Had it not been so damaging or so much work to keep it that way, I might still be blonde, because I really liked it!

(And yes, my bedroom walls are really that color. It’s hot.)

Soo…. when I got pregnant I stopped dying my hair and I haven’t died it since. I do like my real hair color. I wish I could keep it forever and never be forced to dye it again. Root touch-ups are such a pain. But you guys, this week I pulled out FIVE gray hairs! And this isn’t the first time this has happened. Ever since I had Micah, I have been finding all these gray hairs on my head, and I feel like it’s only going to be a few years before tugging them out is no longer the answer.

Once I start dying my grays, should I stick with my natural dark brown color, or will it be easier to gradually lighten my hair and end up a blonde again? I would think that white roots wouldn’t be so noticeable on a blonde head. Or maybe I will not dye my hair and I will look like Bonnie Raitt. Hmm…

So yes, I am getting old. I am turning 27 in three weeks. That is the beginning of the end, my friends.

During a family road trip this weekend, I caught a glimpse of a driver in the next lane picking his nose. Don’t people realize that your vehicle is not exactly private on the open highway? Periodically he would inspect his finger. I laughed so hard. We were clocking a lot of hours on the road and solitaire can only keep a person entertained for so long.  I was intrigued by one burning question: how many drivers could I catch picking their nose? And… what else would I find Ohio drivers doing on the freeway?

I decided to count 100 drivers. If I could see them, I counted them. I kept a tally on the back of a piece of hotel stationery.

I expected to find a lot of distracted drivers, but I was surprised to find that most people were doing exactly what they were supposed to… nothing. Well, nothing but staring at the road in front of them.

I caught one guy mid yawn while dialing and driving. That guy should not have been on the road. Tired and texting? Bad idea!

After counting 100 Ohio drivers, I found…

2 out of 100 drivers pick their nose behind the wheel. 6 scarf on junk. 14 chat with a passenger. 4 scratch… something. 7 talk on their cells. 5 smoke.  And the rest just drive.

Totally useless information, but a fun game to play on the road.